Eliminate Executive Restrooms


I have heard people say that CEO compensation isn’t really out of balance with their responsibilities.  Really?  Take a typical S&P 500 CEO.  If they earn 1.5 million in salary, that is equivalent to 1,500,000/52/5/8 = $721.15 per hour.    Considering minimum wage is currently $7.25 an hour.  Ok, so a typical CEO makes 100 times that of a minimum wage worker in salary.  The reality, though is that only a fraction of the typical CEO’s compensation comes in as salary.  The AFL-CIO database of CEO compensation lists the average compensation for S&P 500 executives at $10,836,843 a year.  In other words:  $10,836,843/52/5/8 = $5210 per hour.

I think we should eliminate executive restrooms.  Here is my reasoning:  Let’s say the typical S&P CEO visits the restroom three times a day during normal business hours, at five minutes a trip this adds up to 15 minutes a day.  $5210/hour equates to $86 a minute, thus the CEO costs the company $1290 a day in bathroom trips.  If this is a daily occurrence,  $1290*5*52 = $335,400 a year to go to the bathroom.

Considering the President of the United States is compensated $400K a year, well, I’ll let you make the leap.

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